I've lost more than 200 pounds!

One of my "lighter"
moments (with Comstock
prison in the background)

Day 24 - Tuesday, January 24, 2012


Aren't you impressed! Too bad I was never able to keep it off. I just wanted to try to document some of the weight related milestones in my life. To recognize my struggles and successes.

Obesity runs in my family. My dad has had type II diabetes for as long as I can remember. There's never a shortage of food at a family event. In fact, during one summer barbecue, with a crowd of us standing in the chow line, the whole deck fell off the side of the house. 

I've never been a small girl. Perhaps average through the first part of elementary school? When I graduated from high school, I was the same pant size as I am now. I know for a lot of women, being able to fit into your prom dress is a badge of honor. Maybe not so much for me. 

College brought the infamous freshman fifteen (or more??) with that darn unlimited dining hall and my limited palette. By the time I graduated from school I was even heavier. 

And then, it happened. I got engaged. With just over two years until the wedding, my fear of the white dress was enough to motivate me into doing something about my size. All vanity. No health concern. I joined Weight Watchers with a few other friends at work and had a lot of success. I lost ~90 pounds and got well below my lowest adult weight. My wedding dress that wouldn't have fit me when I ordered it, had to be taken in about five sizes. I was so proud of myself.

And then, I settled into married life. I gained some happy weight. 

And then, disaster. I was diagnosed with a chronic illness and we had to start playing around with some different medication options. All of them known to cause weight gain. Over the next year or so I gained 100 pounds. Yes, 100. Two pounds a week in the wrong direction. I was depressed because of my condition, depressed because of my weight, and depressed about my unhappy marriage, which would soon end.

And then, when I was just about my heaviest, I met someone. I lost some weight to be happier and healthier. It stuck a little bit. I decided I wanted to play roller derby, but knew I couldn't possibly do it at my then current weight. I rejoined WW. I had some more success. I lost ~70 more pounds. (That's about where I was in the picture.) 

And then, I joined roller derby. It was so much work. Such a great workout. I ate pretty much whatever I wanted and was maintaining my weight. Not losing, but maintaining. I was practicing three or four times a week, plus going to a globo-gym. And then ... I got burnt out. It was just too much work, too far of a drive, I started to slow down the workouts and practice schedule and started to gain weight again. At first I didn't notice, but eventually it crept back up. Luckily during this time, I found Crossfit thanks to Jay's sponsorship of the team. 

Since retirement from derby I was missed the practices. I was still occasionally going to Crossfit. Yoyo-ing back and forth between hardcore dedicated and not going at all. Unfortunately the low periods were more frequent and longer than the motivated ones.   I'd join challenges, lose weight, feel good and then get tired. Or injured. Or sick. And getting back in became more difficult. I lost my derby girl support system and gym buddies. I was shy and hard a hard time connecting to the infamous "community" everyone raves about. 

Last October, I decided I was going to get back to it. Start working out again. Dedicate myself to Crossfit and being healthier. I wanted to feel good again. Like I hadn't in quite a while. I didn't have the same excuses that had kept me away before (house renovations, new puppy, inconvenient location). My diet wasn't perfect, but at least I was moving. Scaling everything but the strength workouts, but showing up. Vacation came and went and then pneumonia. For nearly two months, I struggled to recover. I could barely speak a sentence without coughing so hard bad things happened. At this point, I came into CCP and talked with Murph. Tears in my eyes, I explained how I wanted to feel better, to lose weight, to look good in a white dress again. He said we'd get there. Once I could breathe, we'd start slow. Get back into workouts, scale things as much as we had to. Work around the asthma and the declined fitness. I started to feel good about it again. Motivated. I joined the 90 day challenge with the goal of being able to start working out again without coughing for January 1st.

24 days later, I'm seeing some success on the scale. I'm seeing even more success in inches lost. I've finally embraced the community at Crossfit even though I'm still shy. I'm starting to see improvements in my Crossfit performance, although I still have days where I struggle to breathe, or have asthma attacks.Slowly this will improve. I'm not sure where I'll be on day 90. I'm even more frightened of day 91. And terrified of how I will look on day 366. 

Today, I will work hard. I will go to Crossfit even when the WOD looks terrifying. I will grocery shop with the menu plan in hand. I will celebrate the small victories, on the scale and off. I will support and be supported by the athletes around me, in the challenge and beyond. I will take one day at a time. And I will be healthier and happier for it. (And maybe even look good in that darn dress.)


Food:
Breakfast - orange
Lunch - leftover pulled pork, sweet potato chips
Snack - apple chips, almonds
Dinner - chicken stir fry (chicken breast, carrots, pea pods, broccoli, lemon, curry paste, white wine)
Snack - dark chocolate, almonds, hot chocolate milk


Workout:
CFWUx2
I: 10x2 press (55lb)
II: 3 rounds
   10 ring rows
   10 ring pushups
   10 power cleans (55lb)
   15 burpees
   (11:45)
III: 5x15 ab mat situps